Story Time Saturday: First meeting with Carrie

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The date is August of 2006. I’m sitting in the IHOP coffee shop inexplicably working on my blog or some sort of online prose. Typing away while I converse with a hyper traditional catholic gentleman on instant messenger. We are going back and forth about the biblical definition of the Eucharist. The rest of the world I’ve zoned out. It’s just me, my computer, and most likely Wilco (at that time) playing in my ears. My technologically made universe is abruptly halted when I’m tapped on the shoulder. I turn and gasp. It’s Carrie Blom! The woman I have secretly pinned after but never had a chance to talk to, is tapping me on the shoulder. The woman I’ve long thought was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. I rip the ear plugs out of my ears, and stir up the courage to squeak out a hello. I suddenly turn into a 13 year old on the threshold of puberty. My voice squeaking, forehead sweating, palms shaky, I some how seem to pull it together enough to keep from nervously breaking down. “Can you unplug me?” she says. Blast!! That’s all she wanted?! See the only outlet was underneath my table and her laptop had been plugged into it. I reach under pull out her cord and hand it to her. She says thank you and turns to pack up and leave. 

Cue inner dialogue.

I’ve wanted to talk to this chica for almost 2 years now, and here she is. I’ve got to talk to her about something interesting so she won’t leave. I felt like that episode of Wonder Years where Kevin finally works up the courage to talk to Whitney, but can’t think of anything intelligent to say. Well what do we have in common? What would she want to talk about? What type of person is she? As I mentally process all of this, she throws her bag over her shoulder and begins to walk out. “NO!!” I say to myself, “Say something fool she’s leaving!” So in an attempt to stave off her exodus, I manage to get out some sort of complete sentance. “Excited about this next semester?” She turns with a confused look on her face. (A look I’ve come to know and love.) “Uh Huh? Um great, I think it’ll be great.” Victory! She turned around! Keep going dude! “Cool, what classes are you taking?” She starts to go through the list. I respond with something and she responds to that. Before you know it, she and I are having a conversation! We talk about theology, God, our vision for prayer. After about 40 min of her standing while I sit, she finally decides to sit down and continue talking. 

Whoa! I’m not only talking to Carrie Blom! She’s now sitting down at my table! I maintain an “interested in the conversation” face on the outside. (Which I was interested) While inside I party like its 1999! We talk for over an hour, and are nearing the two hour mark as it hits me; this girl is more than just beautiful, she is someone I really get along with. More than that, I think she is an incredible woman. As the conversation hits that lull that most 2 hour conversations hit. I pipe up, “You know Carrie, I really respect you. I’ve observed over the years how faithful you are, and I just want you to know that I have a lot of respect for you.” Her eyes perk up, and she looks at me both astonished and grateful. “Wow, thank you” she says. We do the closing pleasantries that I’m sure most are accustomed to.. The typical, “Well this was fun, we should talk more.” “Yeah for sure!” She stood up with her bag returned to her shoulder and walks away.

Cue mental debrief.

I take a moment and exhale. For the entire week leading up to that day I had been talking to the Lord about loneliness. I felt so alone even though I had so many people that I loved and that loved me in my life. I had thought all week if he just brought someone into my life I’d be over theses feelings of loneliness. Well as Carrie walked away, I felt no such relief from the sting of loneliness I felt inside. I mean here was the most wonderful, most beautiful, most put together woman I’ve ever met and nothing in me changed. Nothing in me felt a relief, or even hope for relief from the loneliness that plagued my soul. 

Epiphany.

I started talking to the Lord about this scenario. It was then it hit me: No woman, no person, no title, no place, no thing, is going to satisfy this longing within me. I’m longing for Christ. Suddenly I connected with Paul in Philippians 3 when he says, “What was once to my gain I now consider a loss for the sake of knowing Christ. For whose sake I’ve lost all things.” I began to cry and worship, as I realized my heart needed to be found satisfied in Him. The only cure for my loneliness, was the cross and the grace it produced. The only thing that was going to satisfy me was the Word. This woman could turn around and tell me she wants to spend the rest of her life with me, but it wouldn’t change the fact that I have to be found first in Christ. 

Resolve.

I walked out of the coffee shop and went to a private place I go to pray. I spent many hours there talking to the Lord, and devouring the Word. I came away from the experience with two resolves: First, I want to know Christ first before I claim to know anything else. Second, I have got to do everything I can to get that beautiful woman into my life! If one encounter with her drives me into the heart of the Lord the way it did, I have got to know her. 

After a year or so both resolves are looking good. I’m growing in understanding and love for Christ every day. I also grow in love and friendship with the woman I can honestly say is the greatest earthly gift I’ve ever received.

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