also: i predict that in about 6 months, 60-80% of zack’s posts will be vblog…

and, yes, aren’t they cute?

I’ve always loved that word “cherish” in the marriage ceremony. That too is important to a woman. Interesting that it says “to love and to cherish”.

My late dad, a great respecter of the worth of all the women in his life, once remarked that a man who loves a woman deeply and then fails to cherish her unselfishly is very unwise, and tends to create a lot of unnecessary trouble for himself in the marital department, as well as in his relationships with his other female peers.

Zack, think you are right. This would be a great subject for a post, especially since your peers are at the marrying age, and many of us who blog here are already married.

God bless.

22Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.23For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

25Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,26that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,27so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. [fn1] 28In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.29For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,30because we are members of his body.31“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”32This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.33However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

My wife and I were reading this not to long ago during our devotions and found the last line of these instructions by the auther (the Holy Spirit) very interesting in that husbands are called to love the wife as you stated above Zack but the wife is instructed to RESPECT her husband.

Respect=Love Love=Respect

I know there is a book out there on marriage and this seems to be one of the themes that is spoken of in the books teaching. I haven’t done much study on this but just found it interesting that the word “Love” was not part of the verse (33).

I think what I have noticed about my 36 years of marriage is that through out all of the relationship, while I love to hear the words, “I love you” come from my wifes lips I appreciate that she respects me at the same time. I believe there is something about the make up of a man that God put in us that desires respect. And maybe that even more than the need to hear “I Love You.”

At the same time I must Love and respect my wife. It a reciprocal thing. Oh we have had our moments but it has always been in our minds the covenant that we made that is important, “For better or for worse, sickness and in health, richer or for poorer” we are together in this life until the Lord brings us home.

All this can’t happen without Love and respect for each other and keeping OUR OWN DESIRES in check.

Blessings on you two as always…
Tim

My middle name is Hayden and my last is Barker so I just stuck the first parts together as a convineant internet name several years ago. I haven’t ran into any duplicates yet, so it was a good pick, I think. ‘

As I said before you are beginning your married life with a wisdom that is rare. My husband has that, and I thank God because he has the understanding of what a fine woman of the Lord can add.

We Christian women are not as the world teaches, your competition, but a complimentary force that the Lord adds to your life to stand against all that comes between you and the world of unbelief.

How truly sorry I am for the man who does not get that! For when men open to themselves that they fight with us, not against us, how much greater a force we are as team for God that is!

Both man and woman our first accountable to the Lord. The primary affections of their hearts belong to Christ. Therefore neither that man or woman has lordship over the other. Instead they equally travel through life together.

However when there are two people one has to be the point person. Therefore the man (probably because men seem to lean toward being proud as a primary function) is required to humble himself, and love his wife with the same sacrifice, and diligence that Christ does us.

Christ who deserved no penalty for His actions. Who was RIGHT all of the time, who was perfect, the only without sin. He not only loved us even in our sin, He gave up His perfect life that deserved no penalty and laid it down for us to pay our penalty.

This isn’t to say that men are right at all in fact to say they are wrong, which is why God puts us men into the position where we must consider the work of the cross, and the life of Christ, and be love by that definition to the woman we are entrusted with from heaven.

The woman therefore is to submit. However I don’t think it’s to the man’s authority, but instead to his love. She has to let her husband lay down his life for her, and let him love her no matter how unworthy, strong, self sufficient or broken she feels.

He is to love her she is to submit to that love. Therefore if there is something wrong in the relationship the man must first ask, “Am I loving her well? Am I laying my life down for her?” before he begins to point out the flaws in her life. The man is never to become the voice of an accuser in the wife’s life. and visa versa. The woman must ask her self if she has let her husband love her before she begins to point out what he is doing wrong.

But a man is to treasure his wife. That’s way I think the Bible it never says anywhere, “a woman who has a great husband how great is her life.” Instead the emphasis is on the man to treasure his wife. “A man who finds a wife finds a good thing”

Mike has actually taught me this well. He is always saying, “the incredible worth of a woman, who can know?”

I think if a guy is in a relationship with a woman and he doesn’t realize, or think that woman in his life is the greatest treasure he has ever received in this life, then I expect their relationship has many problems.

I tell guys all of the time before they date, unless you think you are willing to lay your life down for that woman don’t get involved in anything past friendship until you think you are ready.

I tell girls all the time, if a guy comes along and isn’t continually greatful for your life and doesn’t think you are the greatest treasure in his life. Then drop him like a bad habit.

anyway those are my thoughts. I cringe when i hear men talk about making their wives submit to their authority. I also cringe when i see very gifted and talented women stifeld by their husbands and his need to be “the man of the house”

The balance each other out that way. it’s so much more pleasant and effective when the two can journey together. Which is why I think the man is called to lay down his life. So their relationship can move past his pride.

my thoughts anyway

I think I’ll do a post on this! I’m still learning as I’m not yet married. But I know the picture the Word paints!

I am wondering if you would comment on the dual compliment of the man and the woman in relationhip to each other, and to God.

I think it so important to understand that interaction properly.