brass tacks: I’m fat and out of shape.Time for action- and your help!
I hope this is the first in many posts. and not just on this subject. Update your feeds I’m back if it kills me!!!
It happened last Friday. I was at this nearly 50 year old British man’s house loading a U-haul truck full of furniture for a Garage sale my wife and I are throwing. As I went to lift the dresser waiting in his garage for me to load, a shocking reality hit me- but first the story.
I rubbed my hands together, bent my legs, gritted my teeth, and nothing happened. Since I had an audience; my wife, the 50 year old Brit, and his 20 something daughter, I stood up and acted as though I had lost my grip. I rubbed my together again, this time with greater force and speed. Bent down into the squat stance to lift… still nothing. At this point my plight was becoming more and more obvious to my audience. My man offered to help, but I was determined. This time I skipped rubbing my hands together, figured if it didn’t do anything the first two times why now? The thought occurred to my that maybe I just need a little perpetual motion on my side. So I took three steps backward, then ran toward the dresser and tried to lift it; nothing. Much to my chagrin, I allowed the man we were receiving the donation from help me load the dressers. After 35 minutes in the 55 degrees weather I was sweating and panting like Oliver Miller in the ‘93 playoffs trying to get up the court. It was sad times folks.
I’ve always had an uncanny strength. Just 2 years ago it would not have been unusual for me to throw a couch over my shoulder and carry it up a flight of stairs. Or pick up a queen size bed and carry it inside. However last week was a glaring reminder that those days have passed me by. My t-shirts sizes are growing more X’s then a Vin Diesel movie, and my pants- oh my pants! Let’s not even go there.
I will admit that I’m being a bit dramatic. Even still with a baby coming, and a Youth ministry to run, I need to get into shape and pronto!
What I need from you? Support. I am going to log each day of the diet/ workout program on this blog and I need you to spur me on!
So let’s start here: anyone have any ideas of what I can do to get into shape and lose weight? Besides the obvious “run every day and stop eating white flour”. Give me some of your thoughts and ideas. I will post a weekly photo so you can follow the progress.
Weigh in your thoughts. Whatever we decide I plan on starting on Monday next week. If I don’t post updates, you guys have to give me a hard time!
Glad to be back in the blogging saddle again. peace out peeps-
Zack, I may be a bit biased, but I think parkour is an AWESOME way to get in awesome shape. It’s fun, it’s challenging, it takes creativity. It doesn’t feel like “working out” at all (except for the soreness). Anybody can do it.
A group of us meet at Loose Park at 11am every Saturday. If you’re available, you’re more than welcome to join us. One of the guys there is in his late 40s. Another in his 30s. Then there’s me. And some high school kids. A fun group.
I wrote an article about ‘How to Begin Parkour if You’re Past Your Prime.’ You can find it here:
http://escape-or-reach.xanga.com/682898980/how-to-begin-parkour-for-every-other-demographic/
A definition of parkour: A physical discipline in which your goal is to master how your body is capable of interacting with the environment around you, by training a combination of creative and efficient movements as a means of overcoming obstacles and taking a more direct path. The underlying ideal is “to be strong to be useful” and careful, diligent progress is emphasized. Strength, balance, coordination, and improvisation are all essential skills for success in parkour training. Were one to witness a practitioner of parkour (called a “traceur”) in action, they would observe a man running, vaulting, rolling, climbing, and even crawling at times in a clear direction. The idea is to move fluidly and maintain momentum in the desired direction, without being slowed or stopped by obstacles in the path (be they stairs, a wall, a railing, a gap, etc.).
And according to the Washington City Paper, “parkour” is number 2 on the list of “Best Rapture Preparedness Program” (lol):
http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/bestof/2009/goodsandservices/staffpicks/best-rapture-preparedness-program
Anyways, just thought I’d throw that out there. Even if parkour doesn’t appeal to you, the article I wrote contains some good stuff about how to construct your own diet and workout routine.
I don’t have much in the way of dieting and workout advice for you. But, like a few post ago, you came out with a really great insight, one of your best. Now, after a good while away from the blog-O-sphere, this post is one of the most entertaining, and funny.
Thanks for a good laugh after a mundane day at work!!
@ Laurie “Parkour”? Never heard of it. Willing to look into it. But I think if I’m going to get into shape I need to workout like an hour a day.
@ John Hopefully this is just the beginning!
Dude,
I’m reading a book called The Fat Fallacy right now, and it’s amazing. It analyzes how Americans look at food, as compared to the French eating style. Basically, Americans are in a battle with their food, while the French have a love for it. All the while, the Frenchies as a culture are thinner and healthier, even though they eat butter, cream, whole milk, whole fat cheeses, etc. It’s all about eating delicious foods in moderation (Moderation is a four letter word for me).
I’m not sure I buy into everything the book says, but it makes some sense. You should check it out for sure.
I’ve also heard of parkour. I have a buddy that does it, and he loves it.
Anyway, I feel your pain man. I got married last June, and I’ve just been packing those pounds on. There’s nothing like a loving, stable relationship to make you gain weight…..
Ryan
Zack,
A little background…I never though highly of Peter Jennings, the ABC News anchor. He struck me as antagonistic toward Christians. However, several years ago he did what I felt to be a ground-breaking documentary on the American food supply, pointing to our declining health, increasing weight, increasing diabetes and heart disease, etc. Basically, it all came down to one major issue…corn syrup. It’s cheap, it tastes great, it’s in everything, and it’s really bad for you. Yes, moderation is a factor, but the truth is many people attempt moderation and are still overweight. It’s because there is something more fundamental going on. Another issue is we’ve worn out many of our crop producing soils and even many foods straight from the farm don’t contain the vitamins and important micronutrients they once did. Not trying to be discouraging, just give you another perspective on the battle we’re all fighting. One simple but major change we made is we bought a bread machine, and we buy buckets of unground whole wheat kernals. Within 48-72 hours a large percentage of the nutritional content is lost after grinding and/or baking. We grind what we need when we need it. It tastes great, it’s one of the healthiest foods you can eat, and it’s a lot cheaper than Wonderbread. Over time we’ve slowly worked out so many of the cookies, twinkies, sodas, etc., and have more vegetables and fruits around. I still have difficulty viewing them as the core of my diet. In fact I don’t. Beef, that’s the core of any managable diet in my opinion. Anyway, the Peter Jennings thing was radically eye-opening for me. It’s probably at the library if you wanted to see it. And last, I think exercise…well I think “exercise” a lot more than I do it.
I e-mailed you.
I think the whole thing is about portion control, and wiser food choices, I love to cook and to eat. Used to be in my younger years I could eat like a construction worker and not gain weight.
Unfortunately, I ate like a construction worker for much too long and developed high blood pressure, heart disease, and most recently was diagnosed with celiac disease, which is wheat and gluten allergy.
Real challenge to find things which fit all three categories, but I have found leaving off butter and sour cream on my baked potatoes, for instance, and eating mashed potatoes as a once in a while treat helps. Also limiting second helpings of the things I like best like roast, prime rib, etc; and eating half a piece of steak instead of the whole thing. Also paying the higher price for leaner cuts of my favorite meats means I have less to eat in the first place! A chicken breast is more expensive than drumsticks, (my favorite), but much leaner in fat and cholesterol.
Basically, it’s more about self-discipline I think, and it takes a while to change one’s mindset from that of dieting as a have to thing, (which rarely works for long) to one of wanting to voluntarily making wiser food choices for long range health.
You can do it, my friend. just start making small changes and work your way up.
Zack,
Don’t under estimate us 50 year olds.
We can still keep up with you young bucks.
The difference is we will stand back and let you young men rush in and try to do it alone. Then laugh when you can’t do it by yourself, Then we help. That’s called Wisdom.
Dad
Hey Zack!
Tyler and Aaron James started the P90X program three months ago and LOVE IT! It’s a DVD program that you follow a selection of workouts 6-days a week for an hour a day. Each day the workout is different so your body doesn’t get bored or worn out. They both have seen amazing results and they didn’t even do the recommended diet plan. But it’s an awesome program that you can do at home. It’s a little pricey…can find it on ebay or Amazon for about $70-$90 but it’s something you can do all the time and keep it up. Thus not need a gym membership. You can go to the website and read more…but it’s pretty great. I love it to and follow the Lean Program as much as I can. So it’s something Carrie would like too!
Excited for this new journey for ya!
Cut out soda. It kills. Sugar in general. Oh, and the creme in the doppio…forget it. Good luck on this challenge! I have faith that you will be able to keep up with your kiddo when she starts walking. Trust me, just because she’s a girl doesn’t mean she won’t be less active. I nanny for little girls and they are monkeys! haha!
P.S. Glad to see you blogging again! I had almost lost hope of reading another provoking, hilarious, or heartfelt post from Zack Hensley ever again. Ok…so it wasn’t that dramatic, but I’m glad you’re back.
Zack, Your blogs light up my computer….it was a long wait.
Weight loss..advice.(everyone has some).take it moderately so you can maintain the pace. forget soda..even diet soda is proven to put on weight. Plant some veggies in your garden….which you have to first dig up and make weed free, someplace in your yard. Then eat them.
Keep movin’
I love You, Gma
Do us all a favor and don’t post any photos till you’ve lost at least 40 pounds Zack. You’re fat and it ain’t pretty. You want suggestions? Push away from the table! Simple enough. Got it?
There, feeling motivated now?
Signed,
Over 50
PS – Here’s hoping you see the humor in this post, and if not, hoping I can outrun you.
Wow! Lot’s of awesome advice!
@Dad You made me laugh!
@G-ma good plan! i really should do the garden thing!
@ Scott You also made me laugh out loud!
@ everyone else thank you!
I feel motivated- I feel like i can do this thing! So Monday it’s Game on!
I will post on Friday what the final plan is!
40 day fast, 2 times a year, on water
Then moderation in between with some mid-level exercise… such as pushing the stroller uphill a few times, or carrying baby in carseat up and down some stairs, or your wife (both pregnant and not).